Freedom from suffering by Paying Attention

Freedom from suffering by Paying Attention Are we willing to listen,to be attentive?Do we try to listen with the understanding of the loving and wise heart or through the confused,disturbed mind?Do we listen only to those whom we like or told to like and believe in?When we truly listen to the words being said and not by whom is saying it,we may get the true message and meaning that might resonate,comfort and bring forth the innate wisdom within us.Are we ashamed of expressing our true feelings?Do we find ourselves in superficial/worldly chatter constantly which leave us feeling drained and wasteful.Perhaps we could also be shut in within ourselves,unwilling and afraid of sharing inner pains due to vulnerability of being ridiculed,chided,taunted and poked fun at,to be made to feel abnormal and insignificant?

Listening and expressing are vital parts and parcel of our every day living.Do we make that listening and expressing beneficial for our well-being and spiritual growth?We can ask ourselves often in quiet reflections and when probing into our conscience.Very often we may not have someone to truly sit with us to listen and allow us to express ourselves.Most often too we ourselves cannot do the same for others.I believe talking(dialogue) and expressing are important for us as humans to want to be heard and be allowed to release the inner energies that aid in the healing process.When we are given a chance to talk and express feelings openly and sincerely to someone who is willing to listen,we can start hearing and tune-in into ourselves,we can start deep listening to what we are trying to bring out/clear out of our inner being(cathartic) as a way of honouring and starting to be honest with oneself.

Sitting/being with a friend or someone close and trying to honestly talk and listen attentively/deeply can be draining so most times we are unable to share and open up.Fear locks us in the painful realm of our being.The danger of being unable and unwilling to talk and express,we keep ourselves battling inwardly/outwardly in superficiality(from egoic intentions) and pretense(trying to look good perhaps bad).The ongoing bottled aggression/resentments inside ourselves block the freedom to live consciously,in truthful wisdom and with open loving-kindness.Thus we allow anger,hatred,hurts,selfish pursuits and unhealthy habits to prevail.So what do we do?We seek a neutral party/person to listen to us and for us to express.Nowadays its not hard to do that,there are so many paths of accessing help to find some form of relief( a little is better than nothing at all) to release our inner anxieties,worries,heartaches, griefs,fears,problems,depressions and traumatic experiences,etc.We do not have to live with darkness within our being alone!There are the crisis hotline/helpline, any organization eg.alcoholic anoynmous/sexual addiction,church group,a Spiritual teacher,religious person(priest/nun/rabbi/monk),a kindly trustworthy person,a therapist,listening via audio/visual teachings,to self-help talks,etc.When we are creative and sincere with ourselves, the door opens to every form of possibilities!Oftentimes, we think we are ok,we deny that we need any kind of help and keep playing cool, as long as we can get away from facing the truth of our inner conflicts.Yes, I myself utilized many crisis organizations like alcoholics anonymous,seek spiritual counselling with a priest and nun and phone centres,etc.

When I hit rock-bottom in 1998,bankrupt to the bone(debts owing),lost,broken into pieces,spiritually parched,depressed beyond words and with failing health condition……I had only one way to go……..Into and Within Myself! I knew I had no one to talk to,no one who would listen to me with kindness and understanding as everyone was waiting to lash out at me for my own stupidity,stubbornness,wrongdoings and mistakes.Can anyone even imagine my terrors as I came back from nursing in Saudi Arabia in total disaster,I felt like there was nothing left of me!Now I can see that I was slowly dying to the ‘old-self’.I see the truth that intense suffering actually brought me back to Life!

Then I remembered an aquaintance,she was working as a receptionist at my dentist’s office and sometimes we chatted while I waited for the dentist.She told me at one time that she was seeing a good therapist for her relationship problems.I called her up and invited her for sushi dinner.At dinner, I asked for the name and number of the therapist that she was seeing.The first day I met Ardelle(therapist),I must say I was ‘cocky’ and desperate and terribly impatient to be freed from all my sufferings all at once! I told her that I dont want to waste time and needed her to help get rid of my problems.She was the most wonderful therapist that I had worked with. In a calmly manner,she said to me….”you have a choice to choose healing and be free from your sufferings or you can leave and continue to suffer,only you can help yourself”.I felt a hard slap on my face and chose to leave her office in a foolish rage that day.After much thought,I came back to see her and we continued faithfully working so well together 3x a week for one and a half years.I saw every aspect of myself that I had failed to see and acknowledgeI had a good look at every corner of my inner being by expressing and listening to myself open up honestly to Ardelle.

The good and the bad and every dark secret became no more a secret.Ardelle had assisted in helping me pull out the weeds that were destroying the beautiful garden of my heart.In place she helped me plant beautiful flowers simply by listening and supporting and encouraging.In my sessions with her, I had to be thoroughly honest and truthful.With her I was able to express myself fully without being threatened or fearful.She allowed me to be!

Can we find the time to pay attention to ourselves…to listen and to express our inner difficulties as well as triumphs(humbly) in order to be Free from the slavery of unnecessary suffering!

http://www.celestehoedenauthor.com

What if the Heart opens,what would you do?

There is so much we can do to find purpose for our lives rather than allow the insanity of the world drive us to cynicism, bitterness and heartlessness.

What if,after getting up in the morning there is a sudden urge in the heart to do something different,something gracious and graceful?What would it be?

What if after sitting quietly by yourself at the beach(or anywhere),the heart is moved to expand and embrace the suffering of others?What could it be?

What if after witnessing the pain of another,the heart opens to compassion to act in humility,kindness and tenderness?What might that be to do?

What if after enjoying excesses/pleasures,the heart realizes its generous capacity to share with the less fortunate?What goodness could be offered?

What if through meditation,the truth that the heart is innately filled with Love and forgiveness are made known to you?What would be the highest Divine potential that you would/ could share with humanity?

What if you wake up to the fact that there is a hand waiting,needing to be held and sadness in need of joy,what if that hand is yours and that sadness,yours?Would you allow yourself to reach out and be held and be touched by being the first to offer it?

http://www.celestehoedenauthor.com

Do we follow Love or Ego

We have fearfully allowed the unawake, the limited,selfish and conditioned self have dominance and control in our lives that we have neglected and forgotten to courageously open the pathway into the Heart and set True Love to flourish.Thus we are confused as to which to abide with.

http://www.celestehoedenauthor.com

Do we Care for Ourselves?

In true wisdom of caring for oneself,is when we begin to ‘wake up’to question our human existence and purpose,when we can put forth this question…”who am I truly?” .

It is when we start to become conscious of our participation in all actions of living and ask truly….”what am I learning/gaining from doing what I am doing?”Caring for oneself becomes authentic when we start taking an interest in self-inquiry,moving slowly away from people,things and situations that no longer fulfill inner satisfaction,human growth and spiritual maturity.

To care is when we begin the need for quiet restful time and space,when we seek out knowledge from teachers of truth and search for answers that have been buried too deep within the self.To truly care for ourselves is when we make an effort to be truthful in saying that we don’t know what we are looking for but yet giving ourselves a chance to do something extra-ordinary, different,courageous,motivational and radical(sweetly shocking to others) apart from everyday mundane,customary,unfavourable, irrelevent(addictive)actions.

It is a time when we give ourselves top-priority to witness selflessness in the true act of wisdom.It is a moment when we realize we want to be a ‘better’ human in order to acknowledge our sufferings and not want to be a burden to oneself and others(not especially so to those we say we care for).

We may feel strongly about not loving ourselves or being hardened,bitter,angry,jealous,greedy,selfish,too addicted to various activities and feel that we don’t deserve to care for ourselves and so we justify our recklessness and negligences.We tell ourselves that we cannot change,we rather continue living the life we are so used to(unhappily,disharmoniously?)…but in truth NOW IS THE TIME to Care!And as humans with innate beauteous treasures Within,we CAN be awake and we can start NOW!

This caring could be going on a short retreat(organized or solo,if permitted due to covid restrictions),Joining a group counselling session(via zoom or alone with a therapist),AA/addictions associations,to be open to a spiritual group.

To be inspired to volunteer to give your time and heart in a animal shelter, a soup kitchen,food bank,any ministry in need of help that speaks to your heart’s call.

To go to the library/bookshops and be open to read self-help/spiritual books,listen to audio/visuals on teachings that speak of working with the human awakening processes/truth/wisdom.

Importantly to strive to become more honest with oneself in cultivating and practiciing kindly and humane conditions for oneself and those around us.

If we do not Care for ourselves,who can,who will?If the others are seeing that we do not care for ourselves,what impressions/teachings are we implying to them?For if we do not care for ourselves,can we say we care for others,can we say we want peace and happiness,can we be the spark to light the torch of Peace and Compassion for humanity?

http://www.celestehoedenauthor.com

The Courage to Change Consciously

“Yesterday I was clever so I wanted to change the world. Today I am wise so I am changing myself.”

~~~~~ Rumi,13th century Persian Poet and Sufi mystic ~~~~

Before my radical spiritual awakening in 1998,I was ignorant and in a continuous fight against the world,against everyone else who did not understand me or whatever that I was going through(pain and suffering,inner struggles and depression etc.).Yes, I was foolish to think that the world(others) must change to suit my needs,my selfish desires and to comfort me and my pains.At that time I was ‘unconscious’ to all the suffering that I was being plagued with.So all the more I defended and resisted and fought to have others pay attention to me and my ways of painful living conditions.In negligent selfishness,I wanted the others to change for me! I was ignorant to believe that the world would give me peace and ‘happiness’.Matter of fact, I did come to ‘hate’being in this world and that drove me to face even more disastrous consequences.Did I gain anything worthwhile by resisting, defending,being in denial,hitting out and desiring more and more from the world and others to change for me?NO! and it Never Will!

What I truly learned and gained was that I and only I had the power within to change myself,to make the effort and work full-heartedly to create the happiness,peace and loving/kindly conditions that I so expected and wanted the world to hand to me on a golden platter.I realized that all that I wanted was already innate Within me,waiting/beckoning within each and every human being.All that I had to do was to turn around and Face myself instead of looking out at the others,at the disturbances/enticements of the world.I had to undertake the journey/adventure of looking deeply,courageously and honestly at all the hindrances(fears, guilt,shame,hatred,jealousy,selfishness,desires,cravings,ignorance,attachments and afflictions,etc.) that I had built up blocking the path directly into the core/inner realm of my being.In other words,we pay attention to ourselves,not in a narcissistic way but a conscious/selfless way into healing and self-development to benefit oneself and others!

www,celestehoedenauthor.com

Flow with the Current of Life(not against it)

When the mind is tired and busy with worries and anxieties and too much unnecessary unpleasant ‘story-telling’…….sit quietly in your own reverent presence,pay attention to the heart and bring it out into the open and it will speak of comfort and tenderness and loving, gentle resonance….listen to it,trust it and become it.In order to end unnecessary suffering,the mind must be disciplined on how to be silent/still and the heart to be unafraid to be left unprotected and opened so to allow all things to be.

When we fight,encourage resentments,argue and be defensive with Life, it is like foolishly wanting to swim against the strongest of current.But when we allow ourselves to flow with the current(letting go of all attachments and clinging),we glide swiftly to become One with the great ocean, with the Universal Consciousness.

http://www.celestehoedenauthor.com

Bathing in Self-Compassion

When we bathe ourselves in merciful compassion and forgiveness,we slowly wash away the grime of guilt, shame,fears, past transgressions,regrets,and faults.We can feel the release of heaviness and burdens that we wastefully carry along our lives.Like the butterfly,a new way of living can emerge filled with so much Goodness and Lightness that we can display and offer.When we live in the Universal law of Loving Conciosness,and abide in Truth,we live in the freedom of letting go(not wanting to control) and the fearlessness of surrendering to accept all circumstances.

http://www.celestehoedenauthor.com

The Power of Amazing Grace

In that moment of grace,it feels like the door of ‘heaven’ opens up to allow us a glimpse of our sacredness and goodness within.It is a time when we are actually touching the inner chamber of the heart(soul,spirit,God,etc…)This is what is meant by the grace-filled moment.It is when we do not run away from either the profundity of intense pain or wondrous bliss but instead look directly into its compelling mysterious force which could make us act spontaneously with tenderness,softness,gentleness and humble courage.We surrender to the power of letting go(relinquishing sense of control),allowing what is to be will be! Grace usually acts with and in kindness to do something benevolent and beneficial for spiritual evolution and human betterment for self and others.This is truly the most beautiful experience on the stage in the journey to find our True Self!

In humility we might fall to our knees simply by hearing a word such as ‘love’,peace’,’kindness’,’God’and be overwhelmed with gratitude.In these moments,the barriers that we have been so conditioned to barricade the heart with might start its shattering process to allow the heart to break completely open in order to be purified!

We are all being called quietly within,not one human being will be exempted or deprived of this moment of Grace if we allow ourselves to listen attentively away from the noise.

In my experience of Grace, was when I was crying on the plane non-stop during the very long flight from Jeddah,Saudi Arabia back home to Vancouver,Canada (Novemeber 1998).I was shamefully feeling like a failure,worthless and broken,lost in life.Yet despite that dark period, I felt a sense of sacred surrendering overwhelming me,asking of me to let go to the goodness, the humility,the whatever I had to face.It felt like I could see a tiny spark of Light at the end of the tunnel.I could feel my heart breaking,tearing apart immensely which I believed was the shattering process of the walls of my heart beginning to crumble down warranting a complete fearless opening to face myself.

It is the power of Grace that gives us the clarity to see the truth that for a long time we had been blinded by and how lost we are in the illusory world.

http://www.celestehoedeauthor.com

Author of the book To Resurrect the True Self

Grounded in Love

How do we find ourselves reacting when we are feeling down,lonely,miserable,anxious,worried,troubled,despairing,etc.It might be that our first reaction would be to be kept occupied/distracted,pick on, project our disturbed state at others,do something unreasonable/negligent and in various other negative ways.

There is another way,the healing way,which is to stay and be aware/present with the ongoing pain and disturbances.We can acknowledge it and not fight with it,let it become a friend rather than an enemy,embrace it in tenderness and understanding that sorrow has come to ignite the flame of love,compassion,forgiveness,humility and kindness within to act wisely and not escalate the fire of disaster… hatred,anger, bitterness,resentments and selfishness.

As we welcome the pain instead of running away(not wanting to face consequences), the pain and the problem will find its way out eventually as we keep learning to deal and brace ourselves with courage and compassionate wisdom.In the meantime, we do whatever we can to find some comfort and resolution that aid the healing process,it could be to trust,to have faith or to allow yourself to be humbled.

In my spiritual walk, I faced many many adversities and persecutions,being poked fun at, taunted,called names and chided at.It felt like I was walking through a tunnel of fire scorching me from all sides,yet always getting through unscathed by remaining centred on the strength of reminding myself of the Love Within that no one or anything can destroy.Then walking out of the tunnel renewed with a fresh beginning,knowing that being grounded in Love carried me through the difficulties!

In the face of any kind suffering,we can get through with the humility of taking responsibilities,patience and resilience of not blaming(oneself or others), or be carried away in anger, self-hatred resentments,unkindness,become unforgiving,acts of malice and growing cold/hardened.When we stay grounded and be strongly aware of the courage and humble strength and goodness that we are rooted in we become sustained by it and connected to loving actions!

http://www.celestehoedenauthor.com

Author of the Book’To Resurrect the True Self’