When we are overwhelmed by disturbing strong affictive emotions such as jealousy,fearfulness,anger,hatred and addictive instigation,we can always practice the mindfulness to pause and be honest,to ponder and take a look deeply into seeing if whatever that is tormenting us in the moment is good,right and will bring us any happiness or peace!
Will we want to be trapped by its toxicity and continue to do harm to ourselves and others.
Yes sometimes affictions can very powerful energies to disarm and deal with…..all we need is not be hard, judgmental and critical or even think we deserve more punishment on top of the already tumultous state we are experiencing.We need the Light of awareness to mitigate suffering,ignorance and harmful tendencies in the face of torments.
Once, while still early on the path of spiritual awakening,I was overcome with strong temptation to drive to the Virgin Records store in downtown Vancouver to spend money on music cds.At that time the danger was because I was financially broke without a job yet.I love music and the urge to get new cds of latest releases was playing on my mind so strongly to go get them.I already had a huge collection of cds and vinyl LP records.The desire was so strong, I drove down to Virgin Records and felt like a kid in a candy store.So I went from station to station listening to every music sample that was on display.Not only listening was enough, I was lost in self-control and was picking up every cd that I enjoyed.Before I knew it, I had over 20 pieces of cds in the basket! I remember feeling very elated and excited about going home to listen to each one.I was on my way to the cashier,when I stopped and became aware of what I had in my hand.I watched and observed myself at that moment and came to a honest realization of what I was doing.I was feeding into my desires.I thought I could walk out of the store with perhaps two cds by then,but as I slowly returned each cd to its respective counter,I walked out of the store empty-handed.I felt good about my strength,the courage to let go,to be aware of what I was about to do and the harmful consequences that would arise….I would be depleting wasteful money on my already almost empty bank account.The relieve that I had from pausing to watch myself and becoming aware of consequences brought on peace instead of more mental and emotional chaos.
It is not to say that all afflictions will be eradicated in a jiffy,with constant practice of observing, watching the self,the mind and its intentions, we can come to slowly remove unnecessary sufferings.Every single time we think we have failed or have lost control and gave in to any affliction, we can practice self-compassion and tenderness for our faults and not be punitive or harsh towards ourselves.In time,healing takes place,when we make every effort to start again.Slowly the afflictive energy loses its grip and strength upon the self!