In every moment,everywhere around the globe,there is someone going thru some kind of turmoil in their lives…..some minor ones and some truly devastating ones,some where the families are being torn apart with so much grief and suffering,because of violence,abuse,negligence with threats of separations/divorce and children being taken away from one parent or the other or from both…
There is no denial to this truth and how it affects everyone,short-term, eventually long term and life time scarring.The mental,emotional, spiritual and physical fighting and animosity can become tremendously traumatic and destructive,leaving wounds to continuously bleed within the psyche.There is a sense of being out of control unable to help contain the devastation,the war between two parties usually….each one has their story to justify…there is no stopping to the negative afflictive mental story telling that plays over and over in the mind.
Do we continue to prolong this tiresome and energy draining,spiritually damaging battle?Yes it is easier said then done when we are in the throes of such unimaginable suffering to which many might not relate or understand the gravity of the problem.
We very often get all kinds of criticism, opinions,advices and suggestions from others telling or sometimes demanding us what to do in such circumstances.Some maybe reasonable pointers and good criticism we need pay some attention to yet the undeniable truth is that we are the ones having to face, deal and complete the healing process as it unfolds with or without support and help.
Surrender is the vital strategy……to give ourselves permission to stop and listen to our own sufferings for a while…there is too much chaos going on in the mind, in the heart, in the psyche and physically as well…we cant think properly,therefore may not act or tread carefully and cause more damage to the situation.
Putting up the white flag doesnt mean we allow ourselves to be trampled or toppled over it simply means we want to take ownership to engage in peacefulness/mindfulness within ourselves before we continue to deal with the reality of what needs to be done.When we first take the courage to put down our weapons(anger,hatred, bitterness, vengence,fighting back,retaliation),it gives no cause for the other party to keep attacking.
If we can come to some sort of recognition and awareness of the situation we are caught in,we can bring that attention into our own being,looking within ourselves to see truly what is happening….we cannot stop or be in control of another,we cannot change the situation that is in disarray(we might be able to pick up the pieces at a later time,when we find some sort of settling down first).
There is a Zen Buddhist story of the strawberry….it goes like this…….a man was being chased by a tiger,he came to the edge of a cliff,terrified, he saw a vine by the cliff’s edge and jumped over to hang onto the vine.While he was hanging on to the vine, he looked below and saw another tiger there,and to add more terror to his plight,there were 2 mice gnawing at the vine……..therefore he acknowledged he was doomed……but beside the vine, there was a strawberry patch………it looked delicious,he let go of the vine to pick the strawberries!
So what is this story trying to teach is…….let go! and as the christian saying goes…”let go and let God”…it means to surrender to the what is happening,to stop trying to cling onto, to try not to be rigid and control what in reality cannot be controlled or to be identified with our mind’s chaos and life’s difficult situation……if we allow ourselves the freedom to let things be, we open up a space for a shift,it might be a gift of ‘strawberries’(graces/blessings) that help us land with a tender heart which might help lighten and make the suffering endurable!And who knows ‘miracles’ we never thought could manifest are also possible when we humble ourselves to surrender………….